business to run

Not Tonight Dear, I Have a Business to Run

You've heard the gruesome statistics. Over half of all marriages will end in divorce. (Believe me, I know - my practice is full of couples on the brink of divorce if we don't do something fast to quiet the raging fire.) Add to that the fact that statistically, the chances of succeeding in a small business are about one in ten, and in all marriages, you can bet that during some time in their marriage, one or both of the spouses is apt to say to one another: "Honey, I've been laid off," or, "Sweetheart, what do you think if I quit my job and invest in an Internet business instead," or, "Dear, I have bad news - that idiot boss of mine fired me!", or "Sugar, let's go into business together, what do you think?!"

Your relationships with your spouse and children are directly impacted when you take on the challenges of entrepreneurship and/or self-employment. Unanticipated financial, time and emotional stressors will influence your relationship with your spouse and children and jeopardize your chance for entrepreneurial success if you fail to create a family plan which anticipates the most likely challenges of self-employment. Married enterpreneurial wives and mothers do not have to sacrifice success in business in order to be happily married, and an effective parent!

If you are considering becoming an entrepreneur by either starting your own business, or purchasing a business with your spouse or significant other, or you are already committed to entrepreneurship as a lifestyle, you need help to beat the odds against divorce and business failure. Business experts stress the importance of creating a thorough strategic business plan before starting a new business. Women entrepreneurs and small business owners understand that we now need to learn how to prepare a family plan as well. Why? Women do not want success in business to come at the expense of happiness in their marriage and family life and relationships.

Women have created a sense of urgency for a family plan as we embrace entrepreneurship at twice the rate of men while populating more seats than men in graduate professional programs such as medicine and law. Women want, and actually demand, a life that creates financial and personal success. Entrepreneurship is the answer to this burning desire and the question to: "How do I create a life I love"? A well thought out family plan makes certain our business and relationship goals are in synch, supporting rather than being at odds with each other. The old paradigm of keeping your business and personal life totally separate from each other doesn't work for entrepreneurial and self-employed women (and it never really worked all that great for men either). Today's women seek to reconcile and blend their professional and personal lives, something which is made simultaneously easier and more difficult thanks to modern technology.

Eleanor Roosevelt said: "The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams". Women in today's modern world are better educated and more driven for professional success than ever before. They are no longer bound by stereotypes with the new image of women represented quite well by the old commercial words: "we can bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan and never let you forget you're a man". To do this we need a paradigm shift, one that acknowledges how our business success is influenced by success in our intimate and personal relationships.

You need to create a family plan that complements, rather than competes against your business plan.

Dr. Patty Ann is a sought-after public speaker, author, publisher and confidant to other professionals in the field of relationship advice. She is a world renowned relationship expert and a licensed psychotherapist who has helped hundreds of people learn how to increase romance and happiness in their relationships. For more information visit,

Dr.Patty Ann Tublin  |
Dr. Patty Ann is an internationally recognized relationship and communication expert. She is a sought-after speaker, author and leading authority to professionals in the field of relationship and communication advice. Dr. Patty Annís techniques combine professional expertise and personal experiences to help women design healthy, happy relationships for success in business and life.